It was a surreal experience to be with young girls again. It hit me how far removed I am from their lives and their problems. My life is so incredibly different than it was back when I was in their shoes just over a decade ago. And I've got to say, I will take my issues over their issues any day.
I had almost forgotten how hard those teenage years were. Boys and friends and parties and homework all swirled around me clamoring for my time and attention. Drugs and alcohol and temptations of every kind lurking about, begging me to take part.
Yeah, being a teenage girl was no picnic. Thank goodness I don't have to go back there again.
But then, like a thunderstorm raining on my parade of relief, it dawned on me.....
I do have to go back to that world. But this time, I have to go back with my kids. And I am totally, completely, 100%, unapologetically unprepared.
I am unprepared for my kids to grow up.
I'm not talking, I don't want my kids to trade baby teeth for big teeth, or learn how to drive a car, or graduate from high school. I'm not talking the cute, "Hey Logan, don't turn six, ok?" or "Reagan, don't ever stop believing in princesses and magic, ok?" I'm talking, I'm not ready for my kids to be offered drugs or see pornography.
I realized, I was ready to have babies, to have toddlers, to have kids, but I'm not ready for teenagers. I may never be ready.
Thank goodness I've still got some time to figure out a game plan, right?
So for now, I'm going to soak up these innocent days. Days where our biggest problems are not sharing that exciting scrap of paper they found on the floor, or giving them the wrong colored plate with their Eggo waffles at breakfast. Days where I've played Legos and princess kitty so many times I want to poke my own eyes out. Moments where I am so sick of watching Paw Patrol I want to throw my TV out the window. Nights where the baby just.won't.sleep and I'm so exhausted I'm digging my fingernails into my hands and desperately checking Facebook again at 3:30 am hoping someone posted something in the last hour that can keep my attention so I won't fall asleep and drop her. Laundry piles that are never ending and stuffed animals that seem to be reproducing in the night and making permanent homes in my living room.
Because something tells me these problems are NOTHING compared to what's coming!